Jasmine shares her thoughts on taking time for yourself as a path to feeling beautiful.
IN CONVERSATION WITH
JASMINE
Who I am and who I’ll beSOME PEOPLE STOP GROWING AND STOP LEARNING – YOU CAN DO THAT AT ANY AGE.
19/99 Take us through your beauty routine. Morning and night.
Jasmine Theresa Burns First thing I brush my teeth, then I wash my face. I usually work out in the mornings, then I come back and do the do – which is pretty basic. A facial scrub – Clean & Clear, Neutrogena, or whatever is on sale. Then I use a moisturizer; again whatever is on sale, it is perfect. Then I put a little foundation underneath my eyes. A little bronzer, a little blush and then a little gloss - I always have a lip glass in my purse.
In terms of hair, I am using a new brand of shampoo that has honey in it. A thicker consistency usually works best in my hair and I always use black hair products. I brush my hair in the shower, put on a leave-in conditioner and Cream of Nature. I wash my hair about 3 times a week, but I condition my hair everyday. I was putting in too much conditioner for a while - I never listen to labels – when the product says use 3 times a week, I was like ‘Oh, I’ll just use it 7...’. It didn’t work out. At night, I wash my face and then put on a night cream. I wear my hair back and use a silk pillowcase for my hair.
19/99 How has your beauty routine changed over the years?
JTB I have one now. I never used to have one. I took for granted that, knock on wood, I had good skin. So I didn’t mess with it, I just left it. And then when I did get into trouble in my early 30s, I used Proactive, and I am not even sure if it was the product that worked or if it was just having a routine. So that is how it has changed - I actually have one now.
19/99 Do you feel pressure to look a certain way?
JTB Yeah, to be put together - some sort of put together. Look like I cared when I woke up in the morning. I want to put myself together and look like I care, that I want to be here, because I do. And it is exciting. Sometimes it is exciting to dress up and take that time with yourself. I always rush through it because I am always late, habitually late, but when I do get those moments to take some time it is pretty neat. I guess these are the little gifts we give ourselves as we get older, or should give ourselves.
19/99 Does the term age appropriate mean anything to you?
JTB Yeah, but I don’t know what age appropriate for me looks like. I don’t think I dressed age appropriately when I was younger, I guess I do now but that is because I’m not into mini skirts, neon boots and crop tops, but that has never been my thing. I still like forever 21.. it is a go to for one piece that isn’t a basic. Some of their outfits are outrageous and I guess that is when age appropriate comes in, because it does say ‘Forever 21’. I actually remember being in the store and getting that being like ‘Ohhhh, right’ and I was probably 33 - I still bought the shirt.
In terms of behavior it doesn’t mean anything though. When I was younger I thought 30 was really old. Now that I am well past 30, in my late 30s, it isn’t anything. It is really only the beginning. I think of that fish analogy: two little fish swimming along and then the big fish comes by and says ‘Oh the water is lovely today’ and the two little fish look around and say ‘What water?’. You don’t even necessarily know where you are at until you are there, and your whole perspective changes. It is a whole new dimension so I think before 20, 25 was old to me. And then at 25, 40 is old, and now that I am almost 40, 80 is old. 60 to me is not old. There are some women in my aerobics and step class who are well into their 60s, early 70s and they lift more weight than I do - they are alive. I guess it is all just perspective as well as perception.
SOMETIMES IT IS EXCITING TO DRESS UP AND TAKE THAT TIME WITH YOURSELF. I ALWAYS RUSH THROUGH IT BECAUSE I AM ALWAYS LATE, HABITUALLY LATE, BUT WHEN I DO GET THOSE MOMENTS TO TAKE SOME TIME IT IS PRETTY NEAT.
19/99 If you could share advice with your younger self, what would it be?
JTB Listen…full stop. Your ways aren’t always the best ways. And not even that, that there are other ways – sometimes I am not even on the right field. So that has been a great life lesson for me. And talk, be vulnerable is a big one. That is a way to connect with someone, and through other women, and other people, you learn so many different things. Even at the dog park I get tips on herbs to use, or different vitamins that are good for your hair, or like, indigestion…these are all adult problems and there is no book for it. So the more I listen and talk to people in my community, whether it be in the dog park, or the gym, or work, that is where I find my information. Or I can google it.
19/99 What makes you feel beautiful?
JTB When I am not tired. When I am not tired and I have some time and I am content. Those moments of grace and serenity. Those are my objectives, those moments. I no longer want all the things. It is more – peace. Which is a big shift that happened after I turned 35. You climb to where you are going and you get there in life, and you are like – oh wow, this is not what I expected. Instead of walking back down the mountain I threw myself off. So there was nowhere to go but up, in my own way so I was at my own pace, doing my own thing.
It is true that as I’ve gotten older I care less about what others think. It is so liberating. I wish I could tell my younger self that. To just let it go. Everyone is so concerned about themselves. It is really not a thing. Sometimes it is you that makes it a thing. Which is pretty interesting to discover.
19/99 Is there anything that scares you about aging?
JTB Yes, having to rely on someone for mobility, getting things, all these things that I am watching my mother at 77 go through. She is extremely independent and sometimes her body just won’t permit for her physically, and mentally, to do something. Which is pretty intense. Other than that, I have shed some fear – cause as I get older it is like ‘I am here, better get used to it’, and it is going to happen so, either I’m in flow with it or I am against it. Most days I choose to go with it. And most days it is not a burden, it is beautiful. But it takes work. I ignored life in that sense, and I was just in the moment, in the moment, go, go. Now I am starting to slow down and speed up in other areas. You know, it all just changes, when there is a shift in how you live your life. And as I get older I am choosing ways that make me feel good, that work for me, regardless of how anything or anyone outside of myself says it should be. I leave the house without makeup constantly.
19/99 Would you have done that when you were younger?
JTB I didn’t wear makeup when I was younger, but I definitely had to look a certain way. I still will not leave the house without a bra. That is about it…it’s just a thing.
19/99 Was your mum really into makeup when you were younger?
JTB Yes she was always really into makeup Still till this day, at 77, she will not leave the house without looking her Sunday Best. But it works for her and it looks easy. I know it is a lot of work, but she makes it look easy. And she enjoys it, which is the difference. It isn’t something she has to do, it is something she wants to do. She loves matching her scarves, and making sure her earnings and her rings match. She still gets her hair done. Takes care of her feet, gives herself a pedicure every Sunday. It is what she enjoys, it is for her, it is her gift to herself. It’s not for me.
19/99 If you could ask the older generation one question, what would it be?
JTB What was your biggest regret? And what was your biggest win that came from a surprise? Something that you got, or became, a different personality trait or whatever it was; that surprising one, not the one that you thought you owned and had, but the one that came out of nowhere and you were like ’wow this is cool’.
19/99 Do you think there is a point that we stop growing and learning?
JTB No, I really don’t think so. As long as you are open to it. Some people stop growing and stop learning – you can do that at any age. Shutting down and closing off, and now the world comes into your house through the Internet, so I mean, everything is everywhere. It is a choice if you want to engage or not.
